These Are Thoughts

1) Sometimes i think, 'Is it possible to do nothing?' it is, but doing nothing is doing something. Uh.... ( the Aidan's Nothing Paradox)

2) Scratch is a weird word. Kind of an ugly word too. Like, just say it a few times. Scratch. Scratch. Scratch. Gross. It could be an insult. "Don't be such a scratch." "Cut it out, scratchbag!"

3) Warning: Children are flammable.

4) That moment when you hear someone making a grammar mistake, but you can't correct it because that person is a stranger and it would be weird.

5) I don't even like driving forward over those spikes that cause severe tire damage if you back up.

6) Why, when apple cores are drawn in cartoons, do they always show the top and bottom parts left uneaten? That's wasting about half of the apple! Cartoon drawers, you fail at promoting good health.

7) When my toast gets stuck I imagine I'm playing Operation.

8) How the hell did someone invent bread? Oh I'll just get some of that wheat plant grind it up, add some water and that yeast thing leave it for ages and then cook it! That's bound to work!

9) I always thought "prima donna" was "pre-Madonna", as in, thinking they will be the next Madonna. Whatever, it's still the same definition either way.

10) FYI, if you beep your horn .03 seconds after the light changes green, I will shut off my car, lay on the hood, and feed birds for an hour.